


Dearest

by elle2706



Category: My Chemical Romance, Panic! at the Disco
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-28
Updated: 2014-09-28
Packaged: 2018-02-19 02:33:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,690
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2371283
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/elle2706/pseuds/elle2706
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Dearest,<br/>Honor me with your presence tomorrow? I’ll wait for you at eight bells at the entrance.<br/>-An Admirer</p><p>After three read-throughs of the letter, Gerard was finally convinced that yes, the letter was clearly an invitation.  An odd mix of anxiety and – happiness? Yes, delightful happiness coursed through Gerard and he placed his hands, letter still in hand, onto his face as if to stop the smile he could feel forming. The letter wafted a soft scent, smoky with a subtle note of mint. Was that the scent of his admirer, Gerard wondered.</p><p>Tomorrow he would find out because he was certainly going. With a shudder he realized that tomorrow everything could change."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dearest

Summer was at the height of her blazing ferocity the day the letter that changed everything arrived. Gerard held out a hand, as much to shield the sun from his eyes but also as an ineffectual gesture to stave off the near oppressive heat that immediately pressed, like an iron, against his skin. He took the stairs down at a quick pace, quite ready to make it into the cool sanctuary of his café, but upon arriving on the last step he couldn’t help and pause by his black post box. Already he could see a corner of paper poking out of the box’s flap, and despite himself he could feel a hopeful tug in his chest.

Silently berating himself over his foolish reaction, he crisply reached into the post box and pulled out two letters. With great self-control he didn’t even glance at the letters, only tucked them into the back of his jeans and continued his quick trek through the alley, rounded the corner and keyed himself into the cool respite of his café. _His café_ , Gerard thought. Even after all these years, he still couldn’t see the café as his own; he flicked on the fey lanterns, the strong, yet gentle glow casting over furniture, tables, and simple décor he refused to change after his grandmother passed away leaving Truly Brewed in his care.  No, this space would always be his grandmother’s; a space he happily cared for in her honor for his grandmother dearly loved her café.

The sudden crash of kitchenware resounded through the café followed by a quick curse. Gerard grinned and walked towards the back of the café, to a kitchen tucked there, already wafting the comforting, delightful scents of baked bread and sweet pastries into the café.

Bob was still cursing under his breath when Gerard found him, kneeling on the floor picking up scattered muffins and a slightly dented, muffin pan.

“Abusing the kitchenware again?” Gerard asked.

Bob didn’t even glance at his boss as he righted himself, though Gerard could see a small smile peeking out of his bearded face. “It’s not me,” Bob said as he threw away the ruined muffins and waved the pan before sliding it on the metal counter of his workspace. “It’s this damned pan that is on a masochistic mission to fall to the floor anytime I handle it. It hates me.”

Seeing his usually competent and calm friend personally affronted by a baking dish made Gerard chuckle.  He gave a comfortingly patted Bob’s back and coyly said, “Y’know I can always just replace that pan with a new, much nicer one. It’s the least I could do for the best baker I know.”

“No, no, that’s fine,” Bob waved Gerard’s offer away and surreptitiously pushed the pan away from Gerard, a surprising protective move that had Gerard swallowing another laugh.

“Are those ready for the floor?” Gerard asked nodding towards an organized army of baked goods on the counter.

Bob nodded as he washed his hands at the sink, “Yea. And I only have one more set of muffins to go before I’m done.”

 “Great! I have your week’s pay so be sure to see me before you go.” He tucked a bowl of pastries beneath his arm before grabbing two pans of cookies and exiting the kitchen.

It didn't take long to set up the glass displays with all the baked goods for the day’s work, and it wasn't until he turned on the espresso machine and hot plates and unlocked the front door to welcome in the day’s customers that he allowed himself to read his letters by the counter. 

 One was from Mikey, the face of the envelope scripted with his brother’s quick, slapdash scrawl, affixed with a postage stamp only prevalent from the coastal region of Oscella. Gerard felt great pride that his brother was already at such a young age of twenty three seeing much of their great kingdom. It was a little over a year that Mikey had left their city of Bedor (and Gerard) to journey with his mentor on her sabbatical. He was hardly surprised when Mikey announced his departure a year ago. As the only one of the brothers to inherit their parents’ skills with magic, it had always been expected that great adventures and learning was in store for Mikey.

And Mikey was hardly disappointing in those expectations, Gerard was glad to discover as he read about his brother’s recent journey to Norsea to stay with the giants who populated the mountainous land for a fortnight. With wide eyes, Gerard read Mikey’s excited recounting of helping his mentor break a giant bespelled with a Sleeping Curse. The letter concluded hastily with a promise to write as soon as possible.

Gerard carefully refolded the letter and tucked it into the envelope. 

The second letter was the same as the others he had began to receive two months ago. An innocuous thing in a cream colored envelope that he knew would match the color of the heavy parchment it held within; there was no postage, only his name centered perfectly on the front in spidery letters and a simple wax seal at the back. 

How Gerard managed to gain an anonymous admirer was still a mystery to him. He could hardly imagine inspiring the romantic feelings described in each letter with his pale skin (well, thanks to summer his skin had deepened to a sun-warmed brown),  brown hair that curled around his ears, and a face his artist’s eye knew with effort could be handsome, though he rarely made an effort  so it barely passed appealing. What’s more, his life was practically tethered to the café and his home on the second floor of the building.  He was hardly as interesting or exciting as, say, his brother.

Upon receiving the first letter, Gerard immediately suspected it was a mistake, some other Gerard that the letter was meant for. Then the second letter arrived, weeks after the first, again confessing simple words of affection and compliments of his crooked smile, pointing out quirks of his that the writer found, oddly, “adorable”. And so that theory was refuted.

His cynical mind suspected the letters were meant a joke, a ruse to humiliate him. It was hard to maintain such a negative perspective though, and despite himself, Gerard looked forward to what he would find with each letter he received, heart beating half a beat faster than it should. 

Four letters later, and here he was again, heart resuming the rhythm it only played when his hands were clutching these letters.  Before he could tear open the seal, the chime of the front door’s bell sang the first arrival of the day.

Gerard turned towards the door ready to welcome his customer, but upon seeing _who_ the arrival was his welcome tapered into a groan.

Frank grinned his infuriating mocking grin as he strolled towards the counter. “Good afternoon, Princess,” Frank greeted.  Gerard gritted his teeth at the moniker but tried to exude imperious calm befitting his older age, refusing to allow Frank to know he was effectively nettled. But the smirk and knowing gaze Frank leveled at him seemed to say Gerard’s efforts were weak and pitiful.

“What can I get you?” Gerard snapped.

“Just a regular coffee,” Frank said, placing ten coppers onto the counter before tucking his hands into his pockets, sideways grin never leaving his face.

Unthinkingly, Gerard placed his letters on the counter before turning to the mug station and preparing Frank’s order. He slid the hot mug towards Frank, secretly hoping Frank would burn his glib tongue on the hot liquid. Frank didn’t immediately pick his mug up as Gerard hoped, instead he leaned closer to the counter and Gerard couldn’t help a half step back at the look of bright delight in Frank’s golden eyes.

Frank tapped an insolent finger on the letter from Gerard’s admirer. “Hmmm, even a hermit like you receives letters, huh?” his tone lilted teasingly. Quick as thought, Gerard snatched the letter from Frank’s touch, his face flushed. 

Frank giggled, “Oh? Is that a letter from an admirer or something?”

Gerard mentally cursed his stupid, expressive face because it immediately gaped at Frank as if silently asking _how did you know?_

This only caused Frank to giggle. Mortifyingly, Gerard could feel the flush spread towards his neck, hotly he said, “Is the thought that I can possibly have an admirer that laughable?”

“No, not at all,” Frank said, though the smattering of laughter that escaped his lips belied his words. “I bet your admirer is anonymous.”

Once again, Gerard’s mouth gaped unable to form a word. With a malicious twist to his lips Frank said,” thought so.”

“It’s romantic!” Gerard sputtered, then cursed himself for admitting in a roundabout manner that he indeed had an admirer.

Inexplicably, Frank’s smile hardened, “you mean cowardly.”

His usually even temper flared as Gerard felt protective over his admirer, “Well, not everyone can be like you.”

Frank’s smile was gone entirely, “Like me?”

As so often happened during his encounters with Frank, Gerard found his tongue suddenly barbed and poised to attack. “Subtle as an anvil to the head and careless with his affections, effectively cheapening any romance you claim to feel with how easily you give it.”

There was a flash of . . . something that passed through Frank’s eyes. If it were anyone else, Gerard would have called it hurt. But Frank’s face quickly regained its haughty arrogance as he reached for his cooling cup of coffee. “And isn’t it a shame that there’s only one of me?” With a wink he strode to a table at the corner.

 Gerard watched him spill paperwork from his satchel on the table, before picking up a heavy tome and settling onto the chair to read, his back towards the Gerard.

He couldn’t understand Frank. For some reason, the man seemed to make it a personal mission to become insufferable in Gerard’s presence. It’s a tradition that started immediately upon their first meeting – a memory that still left Gerard mortified.

It was a cold night in November, Gerard had settled the café closed for the night and was on the way home, heavy garbage bag in one hand and a thick metal rod in the other. The garbage bag was for disposal on the way to his home; the metal rod was to fend off the potential threat of a violent thief who for weeks was terrorizing his neighborhood. His night employee, Brendon, found his proactive defense hilarious – though seriously, one could never be too careful.

As he rounded the corner, a sharp gasp broke the silence. Gerard’s imagination immediately associated the gasp as the sound of a violent thief surprised by his arrival and ready to rob and stab at Gerard.

Trash bag banging against his legs, Gerard raised his hefty metal rod towards the sound and cried, “stay back!”

“Uhm?” came the reply.

Gerard blinked and took in the sight of a man, short in stature, in the middle of a tight embrace with a woman. Their clothes and the woman’s hair were in slight disarray as if rustled by excited hands. The man’s expression held no shame or embarrassment only amused inquiry. With sinking realization, Gerard realized he’d interrupted an amorous entanglement.

Despite the cold air, Gerard suspected he would combust in flames, his face was so heated. With a stumbling apology he quickly walked towards his home, the garbage bag raucously banging into his legs as he made his getaway.

The next evening, as fate would decide it, the man from the night before walked into his café and immediately recognized Gerard. Instead of giving his order, he introduced himself and said, “I figured you should know the name of the man whose romantic evening you blundered into and nearly ruined. Thanks for that by the way. I'll just have a regular coffee.”

After that, Frank visited the café with increasing regularity. Sometimes, it seemed, with the intent of solely verbally sparring with Gerard; most days though he claimed a table and studied for hours, face relaxed or focused with single-minded intensity that was void of his usual arrogance. It was so odd seeing this studious version of the man, that Gerard had once inquired what exactly Frank was studying, already figuring him to be a student from Bedor’s university only a couple of blocks away.

Frank had surprised Gerard with a plain answer, “Charm theory, at the moment. Just the usual course for a 4th year mage.”  He wriggled his eyebrows, “impressed?”

Gerard couldn’t admit he was, so he huffed an annoyed sound before walking back to the counter.

Most alarming though was the short period of time in which Frank used the café as a venue for one of many, many dates (though Gerard could hardly deem the meet-ups as _dates_ , really) each one with a different man or woman, each one of them attractive. This period of blatant serial “dating” annoyed Gerard to no end, and for reasons he couldn’t understand, he was instantly irritated and ornery at each sighting of Frank flirting and caressing his new lover as they sipped coffee, exchanging heated glances. He excused his anger as righteous indignation over Frank’s use of his grandmother’s café as cheaply as a brothel. (A reasonable voice in Gerard’s head pointed out that such an excuse made no sense; Gerard shushed the little-know-it-all.)

Gerard was pulled from his thoughts by the chime of the front door's bell again, and he flushed realizing he had been staring at the back of Frank’s head for an inappropriate amount of time. It was his afternoon worker, Ray, who entered smile practically rivaling the sun. Ray’s arrival typically preceded the upcoming rush of customers, so Gerard pushed all non-work related thoughts to the back of his mind and went about finishing the preparation set-up.

**

Gerard forgot about the letter pretty quickly. The day’s work demanded his attention for the entirety of the café’s hours. Most day’s the café was typically busy due to its proximity near the University. However,  today’s constant and near-overwhelming rush of customers was due to different reasons altogether: In honor of the Centennial anniversary of the signing of the Harmony Pact, the kingdom’s capital, Bedor, sponsored festivities during the weekend in celebration. To this day the Harmony Pact – a treaty and magically enforced promise of peace and justice between humans and all the non-human beings living in the land – is a constant source of pride for all in the land.

 Today’s celebrations involved a grand parade which began in the heart of the city and whose winding journey, thankfully, did not cross Gerard’s café. Despite having escaped the need to share sidewalk space with camped out parade spectators, the jovial and loud crowds found their way to the café throughout the day, most on the way to the University where performances were scheduled throughout the day.

The constant cheer that continued through the day was contagious, and even as exhausted as he felt, Gerard was pleased with the day’s work. Tomorrow, as a gift to himself and his employees and in the spirit of the Centennial celebration, the café would remain closed. Maybe Gerard would motivate himself to join in some part of the celebration on his day off.

 With a tired groan, Gerard settled bonelessly onto his wide couch, setting his head on one end and his feet on the other. Remembering the letter with a small smile, he pulled the letter out and broke the seal. Upon pulling out the letter, a piece of paper fluttered out onto Gerard’s chest. With a confused glance, he realized it was ticket for tomorrow’s carnival. Heart in his throat, Gerard read the letter.

_Dearest,_

_Honor me with your presence tomorrow? I’ll wait for you at eight bells at the entrance_.

- _An Admirer_

 After three read-throughs of the letter, Gerard was finally convinced that yes, the letter was clearly an invitation.  An odd mix of anxiety and – happiness? Yes, delightful happiness coursed through Gerard and he placed his hands, letter still in hand, onto his face as if to stop the smile he could feel forming. The letter wafted a soft scent, smoky with a subtle note of mint. Was that the scent of his admirer, Gerard wondered.

Tomorrow he would find out because he was certainly going. With a shudder he realized that tomorrow everything could change.

**

He wasn’t going. The city’s clock tower rang the seventh hour, and Gerard was convinced that the idea of meeting a perfect stranger who might have a deluded, possibly freakish fascination with him was ridiculous. It was setting himself up for trouble. Maybe even heartache. No, he wasn’t going. Gerard paced his small living room.

The whole day, had been spent in this constant state of excitement and nervousness that he could hardly settle into any task. He’s so far been unable to enjoy his day off which unreasonably made him irritated at his admirer. But now that he was settled that he was not going to the carnival, he resolutely sat down on his reading chair and tried to read a book he’s attempted to read three times already that day.

By half past the hour, Gerard was rushing through the bedroom trying to find an appropriate outfit. He settled for dark blue jeans that were stiff from disuse, his favorite scuffed pair of boots, a white dress shirt he paired with a vest he had not had an occasion to wear out yet. He didn’t own a brush, so he admitted to himself that his hair, much like himself, was hopeless, a lost cause, before rushing out the door.

He walked north towards the University, the carnival would be set-up onto the campus’s wide, spacious field, and as Gerard neared the establishment he could already see the distant spokes and carriages of a Ferris Wheel up ahead. The sight made his palms sweaty, though before he could summon up any doubt, the clock tower’s rang signalling the eighth hour, and he picked up his pace.

He was late as he reached the entrance and was embarrassed to feel how his shirt clung wetly to the nape of sweaty neck. Flushed, he gazed around for . . .  for what? A person with a besotted look to him? Someone with a sign declaring his undying love for Gerard Way? Neither made himself visible to Gerard as he looked around.

“Uhm, Gerard?” A timid voice said from behind him.

One minute Gerard was still catching his breath, and the next, at the sound of his name, his lungs were unable to produce air. He whipped his head over the source and came face to face with his admirer. The man was a few inches taller, shoulder length blond hair unruly, eyes golden. His face was plain, nothing really special, button nose and thing lips on a narrow face, but his expression was shy and hopeful and it had Gerard responding with his own shy smile.

Ruffling a shaky hand through his own hair Gerard said, “Hi.”

The shy smile bloomed into a bright giggle, “You don’t recognize me do you?”

Gerard flushed and glanced down at his boots, “No, I’m sorry.”

With a shake of his head, his admirer pushed away the apology, “Don’t worry. I mean, you’re here now, and that’s more than I had hoped for. I’m Anthony, by the way.” He walked up to Gerard and held out a hand, “Shall we make the most of this night?”

Flustered and still more than nervous, Gerard gazed at Anthony’s bright expression, even with only the bright flashing lights of the carnival as his source of illumination he could see genuine happiness etched into every feature. And that pleased Gerard, he was surprised to note. He took the offered hand, didn’t even allow himself to _think_ about how sweaty his own must be, and they walked through the entrance.

“Are you a regular at the café?” Gerard asked trying his best to recall seeing this man at all in his café. His failing mind came up blank.

Anthony shrugged, “I go there often enough.” With a sideways smile, he glanced at Gerard. “I have to say the first time I saw you, you had me intrigued. As wonderful as your café is, I must admit I find myself returning because of you.”

The words he spoke were as similar as the written words Anthony had sent him over that past few months. They were just as sweet, unguarded, and complimentary. But hearing them in person and with so tender a glance was a potent, heady shock. Gerard didn’t know what to do with the fluttering in his belly, so he offered a shaky smile before looking away feigning interest in the numerous booths and stalls.  A soft laugh told him that Anthony picked up on Gerard’s nervousness.

The carnival was packed with bodies, lines winding from all directions, from the blinking and flashing mechanical thrill rides, from booths offering homemade crafts, jewelry, art, from stalls with barking men and women beckoning passerby to play their games of chance and skill, from carts selling sugared nuts or pastries or succulent meat pies. It was joyful chaos throughout, and Gerard felt his nervousness slowly replaced with wonder and cheer.

Some moments were spent in silence, as they walked around the grounds, stopping by booth and watching a performance by a fire-eater followed by another by a master juggler. Mostly, they talked though; the conversation between the two was smooth and fluid as a calm, bubbling brook. It was freeing being with someone whose company he was immensely enjoying.

As Gerard and Anthony squeezed into a cart-ride that would send them coursing through a railway of ups and downs and quick twists, Gerard couldn’t help but wonder about tomorrow, if tomorrow he would see Anthony walk into his café.

His thoughts quickly shifted to holding on tight to the cart's handlebar as the ride began its course. The entirety of the fast ride, Gerard is embarrassed to admit, was spent huddled and clutching at Anthony’s clothes. Not that it seemed the man particularly minded Gerard’s grappling.

As they exited the ride, the wind continued its lazy dance throughout the night, annoying Gerard with how it teased his bangs and caused the ends to poke his eyes so much that they watered. With an irritated huff, he once again pushed his hair back only to have the problem occur with the next gentle gust.   

“Wait here,” Anthony said and left before Gerard could respond. He returned minutes later, and he swiftly grabbed Gerard’s hand and pushed something into his hand.

Eyes widening in surprise, Gerard looked at what he was suddenly clutching. They were two broad hair pins, painted with tiny flowers of gold and white.  Anthony gazed at him expectantly and gave another sideways smile that was quickly becoming a favorite of Gerard’s.

With a delighted laugh, Gerard pinned his bangs back and with a flourish posed and said, “Ta-da!”

Anthony laughed before saying softly, “Pretty.”

Before Gerard could think of how to react, Anthony took Gerard’s hand, “Come on, the fireworks should be starting soon.” Anthony led him to the back of the grounds towards a grassy knoll. Already groups or pairs of people were settling onto their own spots, some with blankets, preparing for the fireworks display. 

They found a space beneath the shade of a sprawling tree. They didn’t speak, only waited for the show to start, hands still tangled. Gerard enjoyed the fresh breeze, letting his thoughts roam lazily without actually thinking about anything of consequence. His moment of peace was interrupted by Anthony softly calling his name. 

Soft lips brushed his when he turned to look at him. Anthony pulled back an inch to gaze with dark eyes at Gerard from beneath his lashes. Gerard closed the distance and sealed the kiss. He didn’t know if the soft sigh was his or Anthony’s. The kiss quickly went from gentle to passionate in the span of a thought, tongues brushing against the other slickly.

The ground pressed against Gerard’s back as Anthony gently pushed him down without breaking the kiss, leaning over him. The boom of bursting fire surprised the two apart; color flashed across the sky distracting Gerard. Once he returned his attention from the sky to Anthony, he was surprised to find the man looking at down at him, with a smile that was tinged with something like sadness.

“What’s wrong?” Gerard asked, concerned.

Anthony shook his head and quickly pressed another kiss before lying on the ground right next to Gerard, nestling his head on his shoulder. Together they watched the sky brighten with sparks of colors.

**

Gerard awoke with a start, groaning softly at the ache at the base of his back. Blearily, he realized he was lying on the grassy knoll and by lightening shades of the sky he guessed dawn was near. There was a warm weight by his side, heavy but comfortable, and Gerard remembered the night prior.  

He glanced down, prepared to see Anthony’s blonde locks. Gerard frowned upon finding hair a couple shades darker than his own sprawled on his chest. Rising up slowly on arm, he gazed down in sick confusion.

It was Frank, curled on his side, face relaxed in slumber. Gerard blinked unable to believe his sight and gasped as Frank’s own lashes fluttered as he awakened. Frank offered a sideways smile that Gerard had seen a dozen times the night before. Unthinkingly, Gerard leaned away from it, mouth gaping.

Frank frowned, clearly confused before suddenly gasping and cursing under his breath. He too shuffled away from Gerard, golden eyes-  _Anthony’s eyes_ , Gerard’s mind pointed out slightly hysterical - wide with an emotion Gerard could hardly name in his own state of distress.

“Wh- What?” Gerard spluttered.

Like a shaky colt, Frank got to his feet, shaking his head as if trying to dissuade Gerard from his questions. “I’m sorry . . . I hadn’t meant –“ Frank didn’t finish, only turned and fled from the field.

Gerard rose on his knee, ready to follow, but his legs had been asleep and with the sudden movement they flashed with a painful sensation. He cried out and sat back down.

Frank had long disappeared from his view, though Gerard continued to stare at the space on which he was sleeping, the grass losing the warmth of his body heat quickly.

“What?” Gerard asked no one.

**

Gerard’s anger pushed him through the first week. Each day he glared at the door, surprising more than one customer with the fierceness of it, fully expecting a short, annoying student to show his arrogant face and reveal the whole secret admirer thing was an elaborate game.  Gerard was sure that that was how it was going to play out, and he was certain he would react with physical violence for once in his short life.

But Frank didn’t show up. Nor did a letter arrive.

On the second week, Gerard, a little less filled with ire pondered, over the look of utter distress on Frank’s face that morning on the field. It was hardly the expression of a conniver pleased to see his clever trick worked at humiliating his victim. It was an expression that Gerard thought he could label as hopeless. The memory of it haunted Gerard especially during the lonely evenings spent at home.

By the third week he stopped glaring at the door, and only looked at every chime of the bell with an expectant gaze. The disappointment that followed never got easier to swallow. Ray and Brendon, growing increasingly worried by his morose state, continued to prod him with questions. Even Bob, gruffly asked what had him so down. And it’s hardly as if Gerard could explain the whole thing to anyone. Not without looking incredibly foolish. So he shook his head and summoned up a strained smile.

 And he wondered, as he had since that morning, why? Why even if it was a mean plot to string Gerard along, why would Frank go out of his way to do so? Did he dislike him so much? Or could it be something else entirely? And so, like an ouroboros, his thoughts circled endlessly with no respite.

One night, a month past the Centennial Celebration, Gerard found he couldn’t stand another evening alone, so he walked into the humid night, aimlessly following the sidewalk, past darkened storefronts. He passed the University, thinking how the most he knew about Frank was that he was a 4th year mage. Even after the many months that he was acquainted with the infuriating flirt, he only knew a scrap of information; he refused to believe what he found out about Anthony was actually the truth about Frank.  Why place faith on something that, much like Anthony, could only be false.

With a sigh, Gerard turned around a walked back to his home. His thoughts didn’t cease just because he was out of his home it seemed. So he may as well attempt to sleep.

Gerard turned into the mouth of the alley leading to the stairs of his home and caught sight of a figure by his post box.

“Frank?” Gerard’s voice echoed against the bricks and caused the figure to leap in surprise. Frank turned, hesitantly almost, towards the entry of the alleyway.

Quickly Gerard was upon him and pushed him against the brick wall of his building. Frank winced and held his hands up in a placating gesture; a letter was clutched on his right hand, the spidery print of Gerard’s name centered perfectly on it.

Gerard didn’t gentle his grip on Frank’s shoulders, heart beating thunderously, “What’s that?”

“An apology and explanation. I thought you deserved to know.” Frank said softly, eyes downcast.

Gerard huffed a humorless laugh, “And I didn’t deserve to hear it straight from you? You’re right Frank, letters such as these are for cowards.”

Frank raised his head up,his jaw stubbornly set but his eyes were vulnerable and glimmered with sadness, “I didn’t think you’d want to see me again. I ruined it all. I should have been satisfied with what little I could get, but instead I aspired for a dream.” His lips twisted bitterly, “It fits then that it all came crashing when I woke up.”

Gerard released his hold, “Satisfied with what?”

With a hopeless sigh, Frank said, “With being content just seeing you every day, even if it’s only to argue with you and look at you from behind the serving counter. I mean, considering your low opinion of me, I could hardly right out ask you out. You would have laughed me out of the café. So I should have left well enough alone. I knew this but, it wasn’t enough. I wanted . . .” He trailed off.

His heart continued it thunderous beat, Gerard licked his lips not missing how Frank’s gaze fastened on the movement. “ Wanted what?”

“You,” Frank said softly, “Just for you to look back at me with even a fraction of what I feel for you.”

“I don’t believe it,” Gerard said, more as a way to convince himself.

Frank instantly replied, “It’s true.”

Childishly, Gerard countered, “You’re always going out of your way to anger me!”

A small smile graced Frank’s lips, “Is it my fault you’re adorable when you’re angry?”

He flushed and tried to deny the surge of delight that coursed through him. Then another thought occurred to him. “How long had you planned on this out?” Gerard asked suddenly.

The smile vanished, “It was spur-of-the-moment thing really. Conceived when I found a spell to alter appearances. The downfall of the spell is that it comes with a time limit – I had not meant to fall asleep and reveal myself that way.”

Eyebrows raised in surprised, Gerard asked with disbelief, “ You mean, you planned to reveal yourself?”

Frank nodded, “I knew well into our night that I would have to. I can’t admit I had a plan of action to do so without freaking you out. In the end, it didn’t matter did it?”

Silence fell upon the two, Gerard using the quiet to process and understand everything and trying to summon up the anger that was with him at the start of this confrontation. But he couldn’t find a spark of ire. Instead, he was relieved just to look at Frank after a month of his absence. Further, a great part of him was reeling and tingling with excitement that, if he could believe Frank, he was in fact cherished. Cherished by someone capable of irking him like no other; the same person who unabashedly could gaze at him with so tender and soft an expression. Much like the expression he was wearing right now, Gerard realized with caught breath.

Frank took a few steps forward, he was close enough now to brush his hands with Gerard’s, close enough he had to tilt his head up to meet Gerard’s surprised gaze, lips finding their sideways tilt. “Can you forgive me?” He leaned closer, a soft brush of his lips, Gerard did not move away, which Frank took as permission to press his lips more firmly and coaxingly to Gerard’s. 

Gerard was lost. He couldn’t deny how right he felt as he wrapped Frank in a loose embrace. The stress of the past month faded away as Gerard picked up a smoky scent mingled with cool mint.  

Gerard pulled back from the kiss, chuckling as Frank’s lips attempted to follow his mouth’s retreat. “So, this wasn’t all a ruse to humiliate me by making me fall in love with you?”

Frank wrinkled his nose in distaste, “Ruse to humiliate?  What kind of romantic swill have you been reading?”

Gerard gave an arched his eyebrows and intoned imperiously, “Oh? Because resorting to love notes and then disguising yourself to get closer to me strays far beyond the contrivances of romantic fiction?”

Frank had the grace to look abashed. Though Gerard hardly had a chance to be pleased by his small victory before Frank was clutching him tightly and staring at him imploringly, “You said, ‘fall in love’?”

Gerard stiffened, recalling his slip of tongue, and looked away, unable to look at Frank, “Well it would have sounded silly saying ‘falling into like’, right?” He chuckled nervously until a warm hand cupped his check and gently guided his gaze back to dark eyes he knew were golden brown under the right lighting. The darkness of the alley did nothing to shield him from the desire he saw there. And a deep pulsing pull below his belly, like a tide a full moon, responded to Frank's hooded gaze.

“Come with me,” Gerard said softly and he led Frank upstairs.

**

Gerard barely had a chance to flick on the fey lanterns of his living room before he was pressed between the door and Frank’s body.  Rough hands skimmed his sides and settled on his hips before sliding under his shirt, while a wet tongue laved his collarbone and followed the same trail with kisses before giving his left collarbone the same attention.

With a shudder, Gerard began his own explorations, hands roaming up and down Frank’s back, before settling on his ass, pushing Frank forward to close the distance between their hips and thrusting up. The resulting friction was delicious, and judging by a soft moan, Frank agreed.

“Off,” Frank said, impatiently pulling Gerard’s shirt over his head and then taking his time leering at his naked torso.  With a smirk, he splayed his hands on Gerard’s belly and roamed his hands up his chest, thumbs flicking his nipples before coming down the way they came.

“Pretty,” he muttered before deftly getting down on his knees and yanking both Gerard’s sweatpants and boxers down swiftly, Gerard’s cock bobbed crudely and arched towards his belly. His face must have shown how flummoxed he was at how naked he was all of a sudden because Frank’s grin only widened before he grabbed Gerard’s cock from the base tightly and proceeded to give it a few tugs.

Gerard knew his mouth was flapping like a fish's, but he couldn’t help, his breath heaving from his mouth as he let his head loll onto the door. He whimpered as he felt Frank’s tongue swirl on the tip of cock, prodding at the slit with stiff flicks before his mouth closed on the head and suckled gently, and then doing so again harder. Gerard groaned at the obscene sight of his rigid length disappear slowly into the Frank’s eager mouth, his lips slick and red and stretched.

Inarticulate sounds escaped Gerard’s lips, and his hands fluttered, wanting to clutch at Frank’s hair but not knowing whether that was acceptable. Without releasing his cock from his hot, tight mouth, Frank decided the matter for Gerard by grabbing his tremulous hands and placing them on his head. Immediately, Gerard grabbed and pulled on the soft locks; Frank hummed his approval which vibrated straight to his cock; the sensation was almost too much.

He pulled Frank away with an audible, wet pop and yanked him up towards him to crush his lips against his own. The kiss tasted like erotic, musk and salt. He nipped Frank’s lips, which earned him a sharp gasp, before trailing kisses across his face. All the while, his hands unbuttoned Frank’s pants and pushed them down with impatient tugs and pulls until finally, he hands grasped the hard, heavy weight of Frank’s cock. He took a moment stroke his hand up his length pausing to rub the liquid bead of Frank's desire dripping from his slit.

 Frank dropped his face with a drawn out moan into the cradle of Gerard’s neck, warm puffs of his breath warming the skin there.  His hips pushed into the tight tunnel Gerard’s hand made for a few moments before Frank batted his hand away.

Gerard’s sound of protest quickly changed to a gasp as Frank spat on his hand and quickly joined both their cocks together in a slick, tight squeeze. Their eyes locked as Frank slowly began to move his hips with Gerard quickly following suit. It wasn’t long until they found a rhythm they agreed with, a carnal dance with snapping thrusts of hips and the soft wet sounds of skin on skin. Gerard drew Frank closer, practically trying to burrow into the other man’s skin, as the bright, hot nova of pleasure within him grew greater and greater with amassing energy. 

“I’m close,” Gerard said, raking his fingernails along Frank’s back, toes curling against his carpet.

“Then come, Princess,” Frank breathed into Gerard’s ear, clever teeth nipping at his ear.

“Ah. D -don’t call me that,” The edge was coming, Gerard knew and he was keening to fall over it.

A warm chuckle followed by a small kiss on his jawline, before Frank whispered, “Just let go, dearest, beloved, my own.”

With a wordless cry, Gerard fell into his release, deaf and blind of everything but each pulsating wave of pleasure as it coursed through him so strongly, he felt boneless as it ebbed. Once he surfaced, he found he was on the floor, back still against the door, though Frank’s arm was wrapped around him holding him near his side while his fingers raked through his hair.

With a title of chin, he could see Frank’s eyes were closed, features slack and serene, bruised lips bowed in a soft smile. This, Gerard realized, is another side of Frank he never imagined he’d see. He suspected that there was much to learn about his admirer, and with a slow smile he accepted that he would not mind the discovering the reality of the man before him. 

Frank opened his eyes with a flutter of long lashes. Upon noticing Gerard’s unblinking gaze, his soft smile curled smugly as he teased, “Like what you see?”

Gerard leaned and nuzzled his cheek against Frank’s and confessed, “More than you can imagine.”


End file.
